


You Saved The World

by FictionalNutter



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alcohol, Big Brother Dean, Canon Compliant, Castiel Makes Mistakes, Comforting Dean, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotionally Hurt Sam, Episode: s11e14 The Vessel, Gen, Hurt Sam Winchester, Lucifer Possessing Castiel, Season/Series 11, Self-Esteem Issues, Supportive Dean, Swearing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-19
Updated: 2016-02-19
Packaged: 2018-05-21 15:31:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,293
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6056779
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FictionalNutter/pseuds/FictionalNutter
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sam is upset after discovering that Castiel deliberately allowed Lucifer to escape the Cage. Dean gets him to talk about it, and in the process tries to fix some of the self-esteem issues his brother has been harboring.</p>
            </blockquote>





	You Saved The World

Dean wandered around the bunker for half an hour before he finally found his brother, staring at nothing, in one of the back storage rooms. "You okay, man?" Dean asked, a little tentative. It had only been a couple days since the bombshell discovery that was Lucifer in Castiel, and Dean wasn't sure anybody was 'okay.'

"Huh?" Sam blinked a few times, looking up at his brother in confusion.

He hadn't noticed before, but Sam's movement revealed the half-empty bottle of liquor he was dangling from his hand. Dean swore internally, but struggled not to make a physical reaction. "You day drinking now?" He asked, raising an eyebrow. Maybe, just maybe, if he handled this situation with just enough levity, it wouldn't devolve.

Sam hefted the bottle into the air, examining it for a moment before handing it to Dean with a shrug. "I don't know, seemed like the thing to do."

"Why?" Dean prompted, unable to resist asking. If Sam was getting drunk in the middle of the afternoon, then something was really wrong. Dean didn't think anything had happened since the whole time travel debacle, and Sam had seemed fine right after that, albeit worried. But really, who wasn't worried right now?

"That's what we do when we fail," Sam explained, his tone far too reasonable for someone with that much alcohol in him. "We drink."

"Fail?" Dean repeated, incredulous. "What the hell did you fail at?" There hadn't been time to go hunting, so Dean didn't understand Sam's train of thought.

Sam snorted. "What haven't I failed at?" He asked wryly, not an ounce of humor in his tone. Shaking his head, he gave a heavy sigh. "I thought I was stronger than he was, but in the end, I wasn't."

Dean wasn't an idiot. There was no way this was about anything other than Lucifer. He still wasn't following Sam's progression though. "You're talking about Lucifer," he stated, hoping to get more information.

"Stupid," Sam muttered, the comment clearly directed towards himself. "I thought I could actually fix that mistake, my biggest mistake, but all it took was a little manipulation, and he's right back out again. Because of me."

"Whoa, whoa, whoa," Dean interrupted, moving so he could look at his brother's face more directly. "I don't know what the hell Cas was thinking, or how this whole thing happened, but it is not your fault. You put the devil back in the box, and you won, okay? This isn't on you."

"I'm the one who went to talk to him," Sam reminded him. "I'm the one who thought God wanted me too. I'm the one who got trapped again, which is the only reason Cas was anywhere near Lucifer in the first place."

"Uh-uh," Dean shook his head. "Don't give me that. You were manipulated, remember? You said so yourself. Lucifer getting control again was Rowena's fault, not yours. You aren't responsible for the decisions Cas makes either. Blame Rowena, okay? You wouldn't have gotten trapped without her interference, and all of this wouldn't have happened. It was the witch, not you."

"Mmm." Sam hummed noncommittally. "Say that's true. Say I'm not to blame this time, and Lucifer being free to walk to Earth is entirely on Rowena and Cas. Rowena, sure, I can blame her. She's a bitch, plain and simple. Cas, though? I thought we were friends."

Dean was sure his expression betrayed how confused he felt. He didn't want to believe Castiel had deliberately allowed Lucifer to possess him, but that's what Sam had said, so Dean had been burying the problem rather than thinking about it. "What does Cas being your friend have to do with anything?" He asked, frustrated.

Sam huffed what might have been a laugh. "Think about it, Dean. I was in Hell for...I don't even know how long. I can't even fathom how long. It was worth it though. It had to be. I got out, and I wasn't okay, but it didn't matter, because it was worth it. Cas even fixed my mind, eventually, and now my memories aren't trying to kill me. I'm good. I'm alive, and I'm not crazy. When I have moments where Hell is more clear to me than my childhood, it's okay, because I push through them, and I come out fine on the other side. It was hard though, Dean. You know, you had to put up with me for most of it. Without being in my head though, I don't think you could really understand." Sam stopped, sighing heavily and hanging his head.

"Sammy," Dean urged, his eyes wide and desperation creeping into his tone. "Tell me."

"Cas let Lucifer out," Sam stated, his eyes narrowing a little. "I was in Hell for an eternity to atone for making the same mistake. With one word, one simple 'yes,' Cas made my whole sacrifice  _pointless_."

Dean was about to argue, just on principle, but he forced himself to stop, thinking about the assertion. The idea that Castiel had allowed Lucifer to possess him was incredibly hard to swallow, but it was the only logical progression of events, and apparently what Castiel himself had told Sam. If that was true though, then Sam was right. Castiel had essentially dismissed the topside year and a half that Sam spent being tortured as meaningless, on the slim hope that Lucifer could defeat Amara.

"I don't think he meant it that way though," Sam continued, ignoring Dean's lack of response. "Cas never means harm to anyone, even when he's hurting people. He needs better foresight." Sam dragged a hand through his hair, deciding it could stand to be washed. A shower would also likely get him part of the way back towards sober, not that the alcohol had really impaired him to any significant degree. Which sucked, since that had kind of been the whole point. 

"You're right," Dean interjected quickly, sensing Sam start to pull away from the conversation. "I don't think he meant it that way. You're also wrong though. You stopped the apocalypse, Sam. Lucifer is topside again, sure, but there's no archangel death match that's going to level the planet this time. He doesn't have an end goal like before, he just wants to stretch his legs and screw with people. He was on a Biblical mission last time, remember? No such luck this time. You stopped the apocalypse, plain and simple. Whatever Lucifer is after now, it's a whole new ball game. Your sacrifice still saved the world, Sam. Don't sell yourself short like that."

Sam considered Dean's face for a moment, nodding slowly as his brother spoke. "I forgot Michael was still trapped," Sam admitted, looking a little surprised. "No archangel death match," he murmured, repeating Dean's words. A slow smile spread across his face. "I still saved the world from my mistake. It still counts."

"You don't get to take on one hundred percent of the blame for that," Dean chided him, "but yeah, it counts. It's never going to stop counting. Sammy, you saved the world. I won't ever let you forget it, okay?" He laid a hand on Sam's shoulder, hoping this particular train of thought was almost at its station.

Sam leaned into the touch, smiling softly. "Thanks, Dean." 

"Anytime," Dean replied, relief clear in his tone. They had a hell of a lot of problems to deal with, and Dean wasn't even going to bother if he didn't have the Sam by his side. His kid brother was the only person, other than God, who'd ever taken on Lucifer and won. Sam had already saved the world once, and Dean was going to make sure he had everything he needed to do it again.


End file.
